My Obituary List

I keep what I call an obituary list.

It’s where I send people who are no longer worth my time, my energy, or my peace. No drama. No theatrical exits. Just quiet removal.

Please note: nobody ends up on that list by accident. I watch. I observe. I build a whole RICO case—patterns, inconsistencies, choices, and harm. Never mistake my silence as weakness. I’m usually taking mental notes. And when the evidence is clear that someone costs me more than they contribute to my well-bring or others, I’m done. That’s when they get added.

The hardest names to write down are teachers, especially when they look like me.
Far too often, we are our own worst enemies.

I recently watched a teacher—working in one of the most segregated school systems in the country (not Pennsylvania)—make the sweeping claim that “most” teachers are mediocre. In the same breath, they blamed unions for “forcing” teachers to comply with administration.
That’s not oppression. That’s a contract you signed to lead, to be better, to do better in service of others.

You get to benefit from collective bargaining while publicly sneering at the very profession that protects your paycheck, your due process, and your classroom autonomy. You don’t get to generalize educators as mediocre while doing nothing to uplift, mentor, organize, protest, or defend them.

Especially not now.

Not during record teacher shortages.

Not while the profession is under coordinated attack.

Not while educators are being legislated, surveilled, silenced, and burned out.

You do not build the profession by tearing it down from within. You do not protect students by demeaning their teachers—your co-workers. And you do not get access to my time if your platform is rooted in contempt instead of care, while hidden in the guise of “being human”.

So yes—some names end up on the obituary list.

Not out of spite.

Out of self-preservation.

Including friends. 

I often tell my kids, friends are like clothes…some you will always be able to wear. They are your refuge and comfort. Some you outgrow. Light a candle, mourn them, leave them at the curb, then move on. Never sacrifice your peace.
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Peace is non-negotiable. Protect your borders.